Session 10-Soul care

Question 1. Why am I interested in spiritual direction?

As I seek an honest response to this question, I must first admit that I wasn’t knowingly interested in spiritual direction. This class is a requirement for graduation. Now, I must admit that I expected to receive something of value from the class. To explain my acquired interest in spiritual direction, I must refer to the experience as serendipitous. I have received something more valuable than I could ever have expected. Let me explain. I can remember sitting in church listening to the testimonies of those who had experienced a crisis and how God delivered them. At the same time, I felt that because I wasn’t in a crisis that there was incompleteness about my life. I felt that something was missing on my Christian journey. I was in need of healing but had no identifiable wound. I had a desire to know more but did not know what questions to ask. There was an emptiness from within that I could not explain. I was going through what I refer to as spiritual motions but void of the spiritual understanding. I was on a quest. Through this spiritual direction class, where my interest was pique, I began to understand about wholeness of the spirit. Through spiritual direction, my life experiences took on another dimension. I no longer just focused on the mental and the physical side of life but on how my spirit impacted the entire experience. It is a synergistic means whereby my wholeness is greater than the sum of my parts and the spirit is at the center. Even more valuable to my interest in spiritual direction is the sharing or mentoring of others, who like myself, desire more. My spiritual direction journey began as a class requirement. It soon became a life requirement—more valuable than gold. I am interested in spiritual direction because, as Jones states in his book, “The Art of Spiritual Direction” I want to learn how to discern what God is doing in, to, and with my life (2002, 5). Because as I learned in spiritual formation, it is not just about me but also for the good of others; therefore, as I learn to discern, that discernment becomes a tool to help others along the lines of spiritual direction.

Question 2. Reflection on Pastor Mark’s Case.

Case Assessment: For a child of God who has taken an involuntary detour, prayer will precede Mark’s. As a counselor, establishing a rapport that creates a friendly environment becomes my immediate goal. Attentive listening as Mark is encouraged to tell his story becomes imperative. Because Mark is a pastor, with permission, perhaps a prayer for healing will be in order. A focus on non-verbal will help with the overall assessment. As I gather Mark’s history, I will ask questions relevant to depression. After just completing a class in crisis and trauma, I know that depression can affect all parts of the body (impotence) and depending on the level of depression, suicide must be addressed. Change is also a culprit that contributes to depression. Family issues, infidelity, unhappy spouse, children leaving home and change in church size are also contributors to depression. After gathering all of his history, my focus will turn towards dealing with depression or referring to a psychiatrist if symptoms indicate. In family systems, I know that what Mark is experiencing didn’t just happen overnight, therefore, I would want to explore family history. There would also be a need to understand why certain changes took place and what led to his infidelity and most importantly, why did he decide to end it? In the first session, I may only be able to gather information and perhaps assign homework if Mark is willing. The homework would be that of a genogram to get a picture of his family relationship, or to write a lament. My goal would be to get Mark to express openly what he is feeling inside.

Conceptualization of the case:
Mark is no different from many who have unhealed wounds. Until he acknowledges these wounds, healing cannot take place. From experience, I carried anger due to the death of my father and this anger impacted my day-to-day functioning. Only, after I properly grieved did I achieve healing. Because Mark is a pastor, the caring for the souls of others has caused him to neglect his own. In my Pastoral Care class, it was made clear that pastors need care just as parishioners do. Also, because pastors find themselves in the company of the opposite sex, they must be careful to avoid being alone with anyone for any unexplained time. A sense of failure in light of all of his achievement makes it difficult for Mark to be whole because he failed in some key areas—God and the family. Mark needs to be restored to God as he seeks to restore his family relationship. I can imagine that praying or reading the Scripture is difficult for him at this time. Mark was tempted by the devil and unlike Job, he yield to that temptation. An understanding of how Mark feels about his relationship with God will be of great importance to his healing.

Treatment of the Case:
As we progress in this case, Mark will take the lead in providing clues for areas of healing. Because all of the issues cannot be dealt with at once, I will look at the family history (genogram) or listen to Mark’s lament to gain clues as to how to proceed. Mark’s level of cooperation will help me discern the direction to take. Regardless of how Mark’s sense of failure has impacted others, healing must start with Mark’s understanding of who he is in his own sight and in the eyes of God. Helping Mark to establish a support base is very important to his healing. Because Mark’s actions have negatively impacted the family, later, it might be beneficial, with Mark’s permission, to have his wife come to the session. There is a book by David Benner, “The Gift Of Being Yourself” where the author quotes John Calvin “There is no deep knowing of God without a deep knowing of self and no deep knowing of self without a deep knowing of God” (2004, 20). Perhaps, helping Mark come to know who he truly is will open his eyes to who God is. This becomes the major objective of my treatment. Prayer for healing is mandatory before, during and after each session. Mark will be given appropriate homework.

Spiritual Growth Planner
The spiritual discipline that I experienced during this course, which had the highest connection to my current situation, and personal spiritual passion is “practicing the presence—to develop a continual openness and awareness of Christ’s presence in me.”
This disciplined impacted my life in a big way. I found that in practicing this discipline, the strength to journey through each day regardless of pain, situations or circumstances, became easier. I found that I felt closeness with God that I had not experienced before. Just think, we read through the pages of the Bible, looking for Christ but he is in our presence, all we have to do is acknowledge him to be blessed by him (John 5:39-40). I shared this with my spiritual direction’s group and it was a startling revelation.